There are thousands of small decisions that need to be made when planning your wedding! Many even before you start planning yourself or contacting wedding planners. By sitting down and preparing the answers to as many of these questions as you can, you will save yourself time and possible arguments between you and your spouse to be. Don’t treat it like a test, that will just stress both of you out. Sit down casually together, preferably when neither of you are overtired. Make a date night out of it, or even pop open a bottle of wine at home. Go over these 30 wedding planning questions to set you up with the first steps to planning your wedding!
1. What is your wedding budget? How much do you want to spend? How much are you willing to spend to get the wedding of your dreams?
2. How will you pay for the wedding? Can you finance it yourselves? Do you need to ask for financial help from a family member, or take out a loan? If yes, how much and from whom or where?
3. When do you want to get married? Perhaps you have a favourite season, or a special date that you would like to say your ‘I do’s’ on. Ideally have a rough idea of day, month or at the very least a season to narrow it down when it comes to searching for a wedding venue. The theme or style of your wedding can be a big factor in deciding the season. If you are in love with all things winter wonderland, it makes no sense choosing a spring-time wedding!
4. How many guests would you like to invite and how many guests do you expect to come? If you have a preferred venue, check their capacity before you come up with a final number that may not fit into your event space.
5. Are you going to have the wedding in your own country or a destination wedding? A destination wedding will be ideal if you are dreaming of escaping a cold climate to get married in the sun or you can imagine setting your wedding scene in your favourite country from your travels together!
6. Do you have a wedding venue in mind? You may be surprised to find out that one or both of you have a preferred wedding venue, especially if having a wedding or getting married has not been the topic of conversation before.
7. Do you have an alternative venue if your first choice is not available? Are you willing to compromise on price or travel distance if a Plan B needs to be made?
8. What style of wedding venue would you like? There are so many styles to choose from. Do you want an indoor or outdoor venue for your wedding ceremony and reception or a combination of both?
If you are considering getting married in Hungary it has a vast variety of venue styles; from romantic vineyards and castles, to elegant hotel rooftops, industrial lofts and art galleries to rustic barns and ruin pubs. Should your wedding location not provide such a diverse choice, you can always transform an event space with the right florals and decor to create any style you desire .
9. Will you plan the wedding yourselves or hire a wedding planner/wedding coordinator? If you choose a destination wedding I would highly recommend hiring a wedding planner! Don’t rely on the event coordinator at your chosen venue to deal with all the details. The chances are they won’t! You may also be handed off to other on-site event coordinators throughout the process. If you hire a wedding planner, he/she will start the process with you and guide you all the way through until the end. If you are planning a wedding close to home then it can be a great benefit to pass on the wedding planning duties to a wedding coordinator in the final weeks. It will make for a much more enjoyable day for you both!
10. How involved do you want to be in the planning process? I’ve noticed that the grooms are getting more involved these days but perhaps due to hectic work schedules and other life commitments it may not be possible for you to be equally involved. Come up with a plan that best suits your personalities and your time.
11. What type of ceremony would you like? If religious, what religion? You could have to compromise if you are of different religions or beliefs! It may be an option to agree to an interfaith marriage, whereby a professional officiant creates a customised ceremony to honour each of your faiths.
12. Do you want the ceremony outdoors? If you belong to a certain religion this may not be possible, as they can have strict rules and will only allow the exchange of vows and the ceremony in the house of worship. Also consider the climate and preparing a Plan B if the weather interrupts your outdoor ceremony plans.
13. Will you write our own vows ( if permitted ) or stick with a classic vow script?
14. Do you know who you want to officiate the wedding? Perhaps a family member or mutual friend is a justice of the peace, minister or priest.
15. Who will be your witnesses? In most cases you will need 1 each! Requirements may differ between countries, however if you are considering getting married in Hungary, each witness must provide an identification card ( Passport if a foreign national or a Hungarian I.D card if they are a Hungarian national).
16. What aspect of the day is most important to you? Will it be the venue, ceremony atmosphere, the decor and flowers, the entertainment, the guest experience or the food? Undoubtedly each of these aspects will be of importance to some degree. However, by listing each from most important to least important it will better help you prioritise and determine your budget!
17. Will you purchase wedding insurance? It’s always advisable to be covered by insurance, whether it’s a backyard wedding or a premium wedding venue. Make sure you read the small print!
18. Are you willing to cancel or postpone if a global pandemic such as Covid-19 should affect our wedding?
19. Do you want a bridal party? If yes, how many bridesmaids, groomsmen and flower girls/paige boys? Will we purchase their bridal attire?
20. What style of decor or wedding theme do you want? The word ‘wedding theme’ can seem intimidating, however a theme can be as simple as a colour. Just think of a colour(s) that you gravitate towards or your favourite flower and Pinterest or Instagram will soon have you overloaded with ideas!
21. Do you want many flowers? Is there any element that you want to highlight or to really stand out with our wedding flowers? Perhaps you have always imagined your aisle to be lined with flowers, your church door to be covered in a wedding floral arch, a staircase to be draped in florals or your dining table centrepieces to steal the show!
22. Do you want children at your wedding? This is your personal choice and remember it doesn’t have to be an all or nothing situation. Perhaps you have a select number of children like nieces, nephews, or children of your best friends that you would like to be present. If you want a child-free wedding you should be clear about that from the outset. Include the info in your save the date, wedding website or say it personally so that there is no confusion.
23. Do you want a one day event or to spread it out over a few days with a welcome and/or farewell event? Will you invite everyone to each event or just a select few?
24. Are you going set up any activities for your guests, if you have a destination wedding abroad?
25. Do you have any guests that are disabled or have poor mobility? You will need to ensure that your venue is accommodating for them, from elevators to lavatories!
26. Do you want a wedding photographer or videographer? If yes, what style of photography and videographer do you want?
27. Will you do a first look? If you are not sure, check out the advantages and disadvantages here!
28. Do you want entertainment? If yes, what type of entertainment and during which parts of the day? Think about each event of the day, and what type of atmosphere you wish to create. Could your guests experience be enhanced with some background music as they arrive to your ceremony location? Some couples hire a Master of Ceremonies to ensure the flow of the atmosphere throughout the day. A designated voice that will make all necessary announcements such as introductions, letting guests know what is happening next and more!
29. What type of reception would you like? A Wedding Breakfast or Brunch, Lunch, Afternoon Tea, Dinner, Cocktail Reception, or a combination. Would you like plated service or buffet? Go with what suits your style and personality!
30. Are you going to create a wedding registry? If yes, from where and will you choose the items together? Do you want/need gifts at all? Should you ask for money in lieu of gifts? Or should you ask guests to donate to our favourite charity?
Finally it’s always a good idea to ask each other when the hard decisions need to be made, ‘how to best communicate with each other if either of you are feeling overwhelmed?’. Don’t let the planning take over your lives, ensure you have the time to plan it in a relaxed manor if possible and decide when are the occasions that ‘wedding talk’ should be avoided!
Once you have the majority of these important wedding planning questions answered, you will be all set to get your wedding plans in motion! Set the date, book your wedding venue and get down to all the fun design elements, not to mention the most enjoyable part for brides – wedding dress shopping!
Have a wonderful wedding planning experience!